Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Randomize
