Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
