so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
