Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
