So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
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