i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I think I sprained my soul last night
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I am mentally ready for anal.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
