like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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