Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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