OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
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