I want to stick my p in your. b.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
