D3 body, D1 cock
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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