Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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