there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize