what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
