Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize