thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
it was like his penis was on wheels.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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