i jhust puked up my retainher.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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