No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Couch. On fire.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
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