please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
