Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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