Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
