i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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