what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
