I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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