nutella sex= disaster
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
