Grow some girl-balls and come out already
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
