Acid is not a monday night drug
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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