My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
