i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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