belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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