Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize