Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I think people are normalizing furries
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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