in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
