She is in my trunk
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize