you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
