none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
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