We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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