But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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