Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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