im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
He felt like a one man threesome
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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