what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
