i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Found the puke drawer
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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