I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
my poor anus
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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