I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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