I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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