the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
