OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
