Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize