What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
