So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Randomize
