stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize